“You have a naughty dachshund? He can’t do anything about this!”
BuzzFeed Video / Via youtube.com
Toilet Paper: Over Vs. Under • Debatable
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Who Said It: Ron Swanson From "Parks And Rec" Or Stanley From "The Office"?
Which office curmudgeon said these quotes?
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15 UnBEARable Animal Puns
Are we giraffing you crazy?
BuzzFeed Video / Via youtube.com
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What's The Best Perk At Your College?
*Applies to go back to school forever*
When making the incredibly difficult decision of choosing a college to attend, there are a ton of different factors to think about.
Including academics, location, and whether or not you could see yourself calling this new place ~home~.
Harvard University / giphy.com
But now more and more universities are offering students insane perks — from free laptops to a free all-you-can-eat meal plan — ensuring that you'll pretty much never want to leave campus.
ITV / Via bieberiskillngme.tumblr.com
Maybe your school has a free ice cream truck that rides around campus, like High Point University.
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I'm Not Antisocial, I Just Want To Be Alone
Hanging out with people is exhausting!
BuzzFeed Violet / Via youtube.com
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29 "Fallout 4" Easter Eggs That Will Blow Your Mind
In a game full of wit and hidden gems, these are the things we loved most.
Bethesda Studios
Very light spoilers ahead!
Bethesda Softworks
1. Keep an eye out for minigame tapes in terminals around the Commonwealth. You can eject the holotape and play a Galaga- or Donkey Kong–type game on the go with your Pip-Boy.
2. It's possible to visit the iconic bar from Cheers while in Boston, and it even has the corpse of a mailman sitting at the counter!
3. In case you didn't notice, you not-so-subtly find your K-9 companion, Dogmeat, at ~Red Rocket~ Truck Stop.
4. If you stare at the Pip-Boy for too long, your character will smack it a few times to make sure it works or put his arm down from being tired.
5. If someone throws a grenade at you, you can slow down time with V.A.T.S. and shoot it so it explodes safely above your head. You can also shoot grenades that you have just thrown as well for a quick explosion.
Bethesda Softworks
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This Dad's "Shut Up And Dance" Parody Is Too Real
“No don’t you dare get up, no you don’t have to pee.”
Reed Verdesoto has three daughters under the age of 5 which basically means he hasn't slept in several years.
The parody of Walk The Moon's Dance With Me was inspired by Verdesoto's own nightly struggle: "All three of my girls sleep in one room and everything from giggle fits to late night scares can have them jumping out of bed," the Pennsylvania dad told BuzzFeed Life.
Reed Verdesoto
It seems that Verdesoto isn't alone. The graphic designer posted the video to his Facebook page on Thursday and by Friday afternoon it had been viewed roughly 370,00 times with over twelve thousand shares.
Good luck getting this parody out of your head when your kids are cycling through the usual bedtime excuses later.
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9 Everyday Gestures To Use When You Don't Feel Like Talking
If you grew up in a Mexican household, you already know what I’m talking about.
The Chin.
What it means: "YO!"
When to use it: When you see somebody you're super chill with, but you don't want to waste time doing a stop 'n' chat.
Norberto Briceño
El Codo.
What it means: "You cheap."
When to use it: When you got that one stingy-ass friend who's like, "Hey, do you have that dollar I let you borrow six months ago?"
Norberto Briceño
La raya.
What it means: "FUCK OFF!"
When to use it: When you wanna tell somebody to fuck off but not make a scene in public, like a restaurant or a soccer stadium.
Norberto Briceño
Huevon.
What it means: "You lazy ass mofo."
When to use it: When your roommate is being lazy AF and doesn't do his dishes, even though you've told him 43 times since he's moved in.
Norberto Briceño
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Should Women Have Sex Before Defining The Relationship?
“chicken or the egg… sex or label.”
BuzzFeed Yellow / Via youtube.com
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9 Big Stories You Can't Miss This Week: Farming, Fist Pumps, And Forgiveness
This week for BuzzFeed News, Stephanie Lee discovers one man’s quest to create the perfect apple. Read that and these other great stories from BuzzFeed and around the web.
Say Hello to the Apple That Never Browns — BuzzFeed News
On his tiny family farm, Neal Carter invented an apple he thinks can help improve global health, minimize food waste, and change the agricultural landscape forever. But will anyone actually eat it? Read it at BuzzFeed News.
Photo Illustration by Michelle Rial / BuzzFeed News
Living and Dying on Airbnb — Matter
Zak Stone examines the circumstances that led to his father's tragic death at an Airbnb and the company's current standards of safety. "As Airbnb rises into a global hospitality behemoth — reinventing not just how we travel but how we value private space — what responsibility does the company have to those who have given it their dollars and trust?" Read it at Matter.
Photo-illustrations by Matter
How Do You Forgive a Murder? — Time
David von Drehle, Jay Newton-Small, and Maya Rhodan discover how survivors and families of this summer's church shooting in Charleston are wrestling with the question of forgiveness. "Who benefits from forgiveness—the sinner or the survivor? And why do we forgive at all? Is it a way of remembering, or of forgetting?" Read it at Time.
Photograph by Deana Lawson for Time
Did The Jian Ghomeshi Allegations Teach Us Anything? — BuzzFeed News
A year after allegations against the former Canadian radio host were made public, Scaachi Koul wonders whether the scandal has really made a difference in addressing violence against women. "Was this tipping point really a tipping point? Or is it another example of women being abused, the world paying attention momentarily, and turning its back again because some things are too hard to look directly in the eye." Read it at BuzzFeed News.
Darren Calabrese / The Canadian Press
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Here's How Emma Watson Felt About Hermione Granger's Bushy Hair
RIP Hermione Granger’s book hair.
There's no denying that Emma Watson has grown up to be an incredibly accomplished young woman who also happens to be startlingly gorgeous.
Gerard Julien / AFP / Getty Images
This is nothing new — in fact, the world saw the first budding of her perfection back during her days as Hermione Granger in the Harry Potter movies.
Warner Bros.
Now, Watson's revealed to Vogue Italia one of the things about those films that she is not a fan of in retrospect: That Hermione Granger hair.
Warner Bros.
"When I see the images of the first Harry Potter, I immediately think of how ugly my hair was," she told Vogue Italia.
Warner Bros.
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Men Answer: Sex Or Exclusivity First
“You want to get a sample from Costco before you buy in bulk.”
BuzzFeed Yellow / Via youtube.com
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How Many Songs On Justin Bieber's Album Are About Selena Gomez?
A track-by-track #Jelena investigation.
After months of questionably sincere apologies and unquestionably great bangers, the resurrection of Justin Bieber is officially complete.
Def Jam / Schoolboy
Thanks to an unexpected EDM makeover, teen pop's most noxious bad boy is back and he sounds better than ever. While his long-awaited fourth album, Purpose, doesn't quite reach the euphoric heights of his pre-release singles, it's a sure-footed release that suggests the Biebs might just make the transition to adult stardom after all. A remarkable feat considering, well, everything that has happened in the three years since his last album, Believe.
While Bieber is clearly trying to transcend his tabloid persona on Purpose, he's only marginally successful — you'll probably forget about that time he pissed in a mop bucket, but you definitely won't forget about his relationship with Selena Gomez.
In fact, you'll probably be more interested in #Jelena by the end of the album's standard edition.
Pascal Le Segretain / Getty Images
The singer will only admit that three songs on Purpose are about his on-again, off-again relationship with Gomez, but that number seems ~suspiciously low~ for an album filled with reconciliation pleas and songs about love gone awry.
VALERIE MACON / AFP / Getty Images
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London Vigil Honors Victims Of Paris Terror Attacks
Thousands of people stood in the rain to show solidarity and mourn those killed.
Thousands of Londoners showed solidarity with victims of the Paris terror attacks during a vigil held in Trafalgar Square on Saturday.
Rob Stothard / Getty Images
The mourners — many of whom were French — began to gather earlier in the afternoon, despite the autumn drizzle.
Justin Tallis / AFP / Getty Images
"I think everyone is pretty stunned that we have had two major attacks in a very short space of time," said Tomasz, a French transport agency worker living in London recalling January's attack on Paris magazine Charlie Hebdo.
Hannah Mckay / PA WIRE
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The Most Fab And Drab Celebrity Looks Of The Week
You voted — here are the results.
5. Maggie Q Attends WildAid 2015
With 428 "Fab" votes.
Parisa/FAMEFLYNET PICTURES
4. Fergie Attends WildAid 2015
With 462 "Fab" votes.
Parisa/FAMEFLYNET PICTURES
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Social Media Rumors About The Paris Attacks That You Shouldn't Believe
Hoaxes and bad information are circulating online in the aftermath of the Paris attacks.
Additionally, the Eiffel Tower's lights are turned off at 1am each night anyway:
Instagram / Via vine.co
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27 Of The Most Powerful Photos Of This Week
Football fans gather on the field of the Stade de France stadium following the friendly football match between France and Germany, after a series of terrorist attacks across Paris. More than 120 people have been killed in the coordinated attacks. Officials said the death toll is expected to rise as at least 99 people have been listed as critically injured.
Franck Fife / AFP / Getty Images
People run after hearing what is believed to be explosions or gun shots near Place de la Republique square in Paris.
Dominique Faget / AFP / Getty Images
People place candles and flowers outside the French embassy in Berlin, a day after the deadly attacks in Paris.
Tobias Schwarz / AFP / Getty Images
A fireman rescues a dog that was trapped in mud that swept through the village of in Bento Rodrigues, Brazil, killing at least one person and leaving 26 others missing. The tragedy occurred Thursday when waste reservoirs at the Samarco iron ore mine burst open, unleashing a sea of muck that flattened the nearby village.
Douglas Magno / AFP / Getty Images
Turkish riot police use their shields to push back Turkish students from Istanbul University during the anti-Turkish Higher Education Legislation demonstration in Istanbul.
Ozan Kose / AFP / Getty Images
Pope Francis blesses a sick man during a special audience for members of Opera Don Guanella at the Paul VI's hall in the Vatican.
Max Rossi / Reuters
President Barack Obama presents a Medal of Honor for conspicuous gallantry to Army Captain Florent A. Groberg during an East Room ceremony at the White House. Captain Groberg received the Medal of Honor for attempting to push a suicide bomber away from harming his patrol while serving as a Personal Security Detachment Commander for Task Force Mountain Warrior, 4th Infantry Brigade Combat Team, 4th Infantry Division during combat operations in Asadabad, Kunar Province, Afghanistan on August 8, 2012. He was severely injured from his courageous actions.
Chip Somodevilla / Getty Images
A United States flag made from pieces of gum is shown on a wall at Seattle's famous "gum wall" at Pike Place Market.
Ted S. Warren / AP
A worker uses a high-temperature pressure washer to clean layers of gum from Seattle's famous "gum wall" at Pike Place Market. Tourists and locals have been sticking their used chewing gum on the walls of a section of Post Alley for the past 20 years, and although the walls will be cleaned down to bare brick, officials expect the gum-sticking tradition will quickly return.
Ted S. Warren / AP
Tribe members march for indigenous territorial rights in Angra dos Reis, Brazil. Indigenous communities strongly oppose a constitutional amendment facing Congress which would allow Congress to demarcate indigenous territory.
Mario Tama / Getty Images
Models Martha Hunt, Candice Swanepoel, Behati Prinsloo, Lily Aldridge and Alessandra Ambrosio celebrate after presenting creations from the 2015 Victoria's Secret Fashion Show in New York.
Lucas Jackson / Reuters
An Australian contestant prepares backstage before the final show of the Miss International Queen 2015 transgender/transsexual beauty pageant in Pattaya, Thailand. Some 27 contestants from 17 countries, all born male, are competing in the week-long event for the crown of Miss International Queen.
Athit Perawongmetha / Reuters
A Kurdish female fighter from the People's Protection Units smiles as she carries her weapon near the al-Hawl area where fighting between Islamic State fighters and fighters from Democratic Forces of Syria are taking place in south-eastern city of Hasaka, Syria.
Rodi Said / Reuters
Malaysian Muslim activists display pickets during a protest against the upcoming visit of President Barack Obama outside the US Embassy in Kuala Lumpur. Barack Obama will be attending the 27th Association of South East Asian Nations Summit, taking place in Malaysia from November 18-22.
Mohd Rasfan / AFP / Getty Images
A man carries an injured girl as he rushes away from a site hit by what activists said were airstrikes by forces loyal to Syria's President Bashar al-Assad, in the Douma neighborhood of Damascus, Syria.
Bassam Khabieh / Reuters
Kurdish brides Halbast Khalili and Mezgin Murat, both age 21, are greeted by their guests during their wedding reception without their grooms in Rojava, Syria. They married their husbands in absentia two months after the brothers successfully immigrated to Germany in the arduous journey as refugees. The women plan to join their husbands in Europe once their immigration documents have been processed.
John Moore / Getty Images
A boy kisses a photo of his father at a martyrs' cemetery for soldiers from the People's Protection Units, all killed fighting ISIL in Qamishli, Rojava, Syria.
John Moore / Getty Images
A youth paints a slogan on the wall of the Bank of Greece headquarters as fires caused by petrol bombs burn at the entrance of the bank in Athens, Greece. The slogan on the wall reads "Burn it".
Alkis Konstantinidis / Reuters
Ukrainian police detain activists of women's rights group "Femen" as they protest against homophobia outside the parliament building in Kiev, Ukraine. Femen and gay rights activists are pushing parliament to adopt bills, including one that would ban discrimination in the workplace based on sexuality, which is included in a package of laws to liberalize Ukraine's visa regime with the EU.
Gleb Garanich / Reuters
An anti-capitalist protester wearing a Guy Fawkes mask stands alongside a burning police car during the "Million Masks March", organized by the group Anonymous in London. The protest was held on the night of Britain's "Guy Fawkes Night", and many of the marchers wore the white masks of the man who plotted to blow up parliament in 1605, now associated with Anonymous.
Jack Taylor / AFP / Getty Images
Members of Latino organizations rally against Republican Presidential candidate Donald Trump outside the Trump Tower in New York City, just before hosting NBC's Saturday Night Live.
Andrew Renneisen / Getty Images
New York Red Bulls supporters rally outside of Red Bull Arena prior to an MLS playoff soccer match between the Red Bulls and the D.C. United, in Harrison, N.J.
Julio Cortez / AP
Human skulls or "natitas" crowned with flowers are surrounded by offerings of coca leaves, flower petals and cigarettes, outside the Cementerio General chapel during the Natitas Festival in La Paz, Bolivia. Although some natitas have been handed down through generations, many are from abandoned graves and decorated as amulets in the belief that they serve as protection.
Juan Karita / AP
One of fourteen orangutans waits in a cage to be sent back to Indonesia at a military airport in Bangkok, Thailand. These orangutans were allegedly smuggled out of Indonesia into a private zoo in Thailand. Thailand and Indonesia have cooperated in the repatriation program to return the primates to their original habitat.
Sakchai Lalit / AP
A Hazara boy watches during a ceremony for beheaded Hazara victims, in Kabul, Afghanistan. The beheaded bodies of seven Hazaras were found in Zabul, neighboring Ghazni on Saturday. The four men, two women and a child had been kidnapped up to six months ago, officials said. Hazaras, who are predominantly Shiite, have been targeted in several large-scale kidnappings this year.
Massoud Hossaini / AP
Children flash the victory sign after singing the Rojava anthem at a public elementary school in Qamishli, Rojava, Syria. Although funds are short for school supplies, schools have changed their curriculum and have begun teaching in Kurdish as the primary language, along with Arabic and English. The autonomous regional government, based on a local communal system, promotes gender equality and equal public education for girls and boys.
John Moore / Getty Images
A banner reading 'We are Paris ' is pictured among candles and flowers outside the French embassy in Berlin, a day after deadly attacks in Paris.
Tobias Schwarz / AFP / Getty Images
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People In Paris Are Giving Blood For Victims Of The Terrorist Attacks
Donations at weekly blood drives surged in a display of national solidarity.
Parisians turned out in droves on Saturday morning to donate blood to support victims of Friday's terrorist attacks in the city.
Dominique Faget / AFP / Getty Images
There was a huge surge in blood donations at Don Du Sang Paris's weekly blood drives at hospitals across the city, despite the French government's advice that people should stay indoors and the closure of several Metro lines.
At Hospital St Antoine opposite Petit Cambodge restaurant, where many were killed when gunmen used assault rifles to open fire on the crowds, people queued for hours.
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We Tried YouTube Makeup Tutorials And This Is What Happened
Turns out fake eyelashes are actually just torture devices.
...And sometimes the final product ends up looking like this:
Comedy Central
1. If they worked for the makeup inept
2. If they worked for all different face shapes and skin tones
3. To document our failures for the world wide web!
Charlotte Gomez and Macey J. Foronda for BuzzFeed
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Thousands Light Up Social Media With A Candle For Paris
As night fell Saturday on Paris, thousands refused to let the bloodshed dim the City of Lights, posting their lit candles using #UneBougiePourParis.
People light candles for the victims of the Paris attacks in central Tirana, Albania.
Arben Celi / Reuters
As the world continued to mourn the terrorist attacks in Paris, thousands on Saturday paid tribute to the victims on social media with #UneBougiePourParis, or "A Candle For Paris."
In all, 129 were killed and 352 were injured at six locations in what French authorities described as coordinated attack carried out by seven assailants — all of whom died in the process.
Vigils sprung up across the world overnight Friday as major landmarks were illuminated in the colors of France in a show of global solidarity.
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