21 Of The Greatest Abe Simpson Moments Ever
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17 People Who Are Living Your Worst Fucking Nightmare
IT REALLY HAPPENS!
You think you're safe...
You think you're invincible...
But it really happens.
They come for you AND your water cup.
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19 Wikipedia Pages That'll Send You Into A Weeklong Wikihole
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Do You Think You're Better Than Me?
I bet you do…
I'm 6'4."
I can eat seven slices of pizza.
I wear size 12 sneakers.
I tolerate Megan Trainor.
I like the taste of envelopes.
I am right-handed.
I drink whole milk.
I enjoy scented candles.
I have never seen The Godfather.
I once built an Ikea bed frame by myself.
I am not a fan of dessert.
Jon Premosch / BuzzFeed
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Can You Spot The Boner?
It’s hard — choose wisely.
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16 Things No One Tells You About The Morning-After Pill
Take that, broken condom.
Jenny Chang / BuzzFeed
Emergency contraception comes in a few different forms.
You probably know it best as the morning-after pill (like Plan B One-Step, Next Choice, Ella, etc.) but your other options are the copper IUD or a high dose of regular birth control pills — but more on all these later.
The morning-after pill is not the same as the abortion pill.
Emergency contraception delays ovulation (when an egg is released from your ovary and could maybe get fertilized by sperm) and may, in some cases, prevent a fertilized egg from implanting in your uterine lining. What it won’t do is end an existing pregnancy. The abortion pill, or Mifeprex, terminates an early pregnancy. “You couldn’t take enough levonorgestrel [Plan B One-Step] to cause an abortion,” James Trussell, Ph.D., senior research demographer of the Office of Population Research at Princeton University, tells BuzzFeed Life. “It’s not physiologically capable of doing so.”
You don't need to take it the morning after unprotected sex. You can take it that night or even a few days later.
The labeling on Plan B One-Step and its generics say that you should take it within 72 hours of unprotected sex, and that it’s most effective the sooner you take it. That’s a solid suggestion, but more recent research found that it might be just as effective on days one through four. And it’s possible that it might still be effective on day five, depending on where you are in your cycle, Dr. Alyssa Dweck, certified OB-GYN, co-author of V Is for Vagina, tells BuzzFeed Life. Obviously you should never wait to take emergency contraception, says Trussell, but if you think you’re too late, call your doctor or a pharmacist to ask about your options. You might still have some time.
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31 Two-Person Halloween Costumes That Are Borderline Genius
“Boos” are better in twos.
Imperator Furiosa and Mad Max
BuzzFeed
Taco Bell
BuzzFeed
A Ghostbuster and Slimer
BuzzFeed
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We Bet You Can't Guess Who This Celeb Is On The First Try
Don’t be fooled by the man bun.
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What People Expect Women To Be Like Vs. What They're Actually Like
We don’t give blow jobs to Magnums.
Expectation: Women eat ice creams like they're giving a sexy blow job.
They find Magnum ice creams particularly erotic. Every woman eats a Magnum like a dick.
Unilever / Magnum
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People Are Angry About This Disney Costume They Say Is Brownface
Disney is selling a full-body brown-skin costume of Maui from Moana for kids this Halloween, and people are offended.
People are accusing Disney of cultural appropriation for selling a brown-skin tattoo costume of Maui, a Polynesian demigod who is voiced by Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson in the upcoming film Moana.
Disney / Via disneystore.com
Disney
Disney
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This 15-Year-Old Dog Lived Just Long Enough To See His Human Get Married
“It was a phenomenal moment. It was a phenomenal 15 years.”
Charlie Bear, a 15-year-old black lab mix battling a brain tumor, lived just long enough to see his human get married earlier this month.
The bride, Kelly O'Connell, met Charlie Bear when he was just 12 weeks old. After being found abandoned in a shopping cart outside a grocery store, he was brought to the animal shelter where O'Connell was working while studying to be a veterinarian — and it was love at first sight.
"I wasn’t looking for a dog," O'Connell told BuzzFeed News. "I was 19, still living with my parents and going to college. It was the worst time in my life to even attempt to get a dog.
"He came in, and I was like, 'Yup. I’m taking this puppy home,'" she said.
Jennifer Dziuvenis / Via Facebook: jendzphotography
Charlie became her "best friend." The two of them "grew up together" and moved from New York to Colorado.
In 2010, she met fellow veterinarian James Garvin, fell in love, and moved in with him and his two sons.
“Charlie got whatever he wanted," O'Connell said. "But I couldn’t offer him a family. As soon as I met James and the boys, it was the last thing that I could give him. We were one big happy family."
Jennifer Dziuvenis / Via Facebook: jendzphotography
One week before the wedding, Charlie had five seizures, and seemed to be suffering quite a bit. O'Connell and Garvin made arrangements for him to be put to sleep.
But, during the week leading up to the wedding, he had no seizures, no trouble walking, and "seemed like a whole new dog," O'Connell said. She thought he might actually make it to the wedding.
"I just thought, I want him to see this," she said.
O'Connell and Garvin were married on Sept. 1, with Charlie Bear and one of their other five dogs by their side.
O'Connell said she "immediately broke down" when Charlie Bear walked down the aisle to her.
"James and I just grabbed onto him, and we just kept saying, 'You made it, buddy, you made it.'"
Jennifer Dziuvenis / Via Facebook: jendzphotography
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Thousands Of Life Jackets Have Been Laid Out In London In Tribute To Refugees
About 30 volunteers arranged more than 2,500 life jackets, which had been used by refugees to cross the Mediterranean, below Big Ben.
Thousands of life jackets used by refugees who made the dangerous journey to Europe have been laid beneath Big Ben in central London.
SWNS
Around 2,500 vests were laid out in lines on Parliament Square overnight, creating a dramatic spectacle for Monday-morning commuters that was labelled a "life jacket graveyard."
SWNS
SWNS
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A High School Teacher Allegedly Told A Student To "Lick Me Where I Fart"
Among other things.
A high school English teacher in Ontario, Canada, will this week face charges of professional misconduct after allegedly telling a student to "lick me where I fart."
Grand Erie District School Board / Via granderie.ca
According to a notice of hearing from the Ontario College of Teachers, Jennifer Elizabeth Green-Johnson, who teaches grades 10 through 12 at at Dunnville Secondary School, has also been accused of calling a student a "bloody pedophile," and allegedly said another "looked like a frumpy old lady today."
Upon being offered muffins by a student in exchange for a passing grade, Green-Johnson also allegedly said, "You mean a bribe? I'd be able to shit for a week 'cause of all that fiber."
Green-Johnson also allegedly said, "Get that fucking thing out of here" to a student who brought in coffee; told a student, "I have never said this to a student before, but fuck you"; and said, "It's debate, not masturbate" to the class, all within the 2015–2016 school year.
Dunnville Secondary School
Google Maps
Green-Johnson was suspended for a month without pay last January for professional misconduct, in part because she saw one male student jump on another's back and responded, "So, you like it from behind?"
There will be a hearing to determine if Green-Johnson is guilty of the charges on Sept. 23.
Green-Johnson did not immediately respond to requests for comment.
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10 Things Women Realize When They Start Shopping In The Men's Section
Pockets! THAT YOU CAN ACTUALLY PUT STUFF IN!!!
Unlike in the women's section, most shirts in the men's department aren't totally transparent.
Nothing against transparent shirts, but it would be kind of nice to have a choice in the matter.
Instagram: @www.instagram.com/sabrinareal/?hl=pt-br
Which means you get to spend less time trying to find special bras for all those blouses that have inexplicable holes and empty spots all over them.
So are clothing brands just totally ignoring the existence of bras, or what?
It may be hard to believe, but the pants in the men's section have pockets THAT YOU CAN ACTUALLY PUT STUFF IN.
Seriously, try putting anything bigger than a hair clip into the pockets of women's jeans. It just doesn't work.
Flora Paul
And for some inexplicable reason, similar products in the men's section, including clothing, usually COST LESS!
...OK.
The Daily Share / Via youtube.com
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Which "Hamilton" Character Are You Based On Your Fave Alcohol?
I am not throwing away my shot.
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How Normal Are Your Color Preferences?
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People Love This Photo Of A Stuntwoman High Kicking On The Emmys Red Carpet
This is Jessie Graff. She's a professional stuntwoman and a contestant on Emmy-nominated reality show American Ninja Warrior. When she turned up at the awards' red carpet on Sunday night, she pulled some pretty awesome moves.
Jeff Kravitz / FilmMagic
This picture of Graff's high-kicking turn ahead of the ceremony was shared thousands of times on Twitter overnight after being posted by user @aoiph with the caption: "This is the best red carpet photo I've ever seen."
Danny Moloshok / AP
Alberto E. Rodriguez / Getty Images
It's her multiple appearances on American Ninja Warrior she's most famous for, however. Earlier this month, she was the first woman in the history of the NBC show to complete the Stage 1 qualifier, and became its most successful female contestant ever.
Speaking to USA Today at the time, she said: "My first year doing Ninja Warrior, I didn’t really know what it was about. After that, when so many people were like, 'I didn’t know women could do that,' I thought, 'Then, we better show you.'"
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17 Facts About “The Blair Witch Project” That Will Blow Your Mind
Safe word: “taco.”
Some people were convinced that Heather Donahue was actually dead and sent her mother sympathy cards.
William Thomas Cain / Getty Images
The film only had an initial $20-$25k budget to shoot.
nelenis / Via instagram.com
The entire film was shot in eight days but took eight months to edit.
namethatfilm / Via instagram.com
The "script" was 35 pages long and contained no dialogue.
CinemaSins / Via youtube.com
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19 Photos That Prove Ikea Furniture Is Actually The Goddamn Devil
*prays the leftover screw in my hand isn’t for anything important*
Ikea is a wonderful place, but building its furniture isn't always easy.
If you're not struggling to assemble a simple chair...
...you're struggling to get the furniture home in the first place.
And you're bound to have an existential crisis before you've even finished opening the boxes.
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31 Things Everyone Who Grew Up With Carvel Will Understand
The dueling layers of ice cream. The eerily perfect frosting. The neon swirls. THE CRUNCHIES.
If you've ever tasted a Carvel ice cream cake, you understand why this is so exciting.
Basically, they're perfect. There's truly no better birthday cake out there.
Carvel can take so many forms. There's Fudgy the Whale, a classic.
There are endless options for customization, if you want an original.
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