“You never see an old man having a Twix.”
When he had a problem with the dead.
Passion Distribution / Via scumfuc-reincarnate-deactivated.tumblr.com
When he made this logical reasoning.
HBO / Via sundayintro.tumblr.com
24 Times Karl Pilkington Made Way Too Much Sense
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Poem: "Brown Girl Dreaming" By Jacqueline Woodson
Who is this brown girl dreaming, my teacher wants to know.
Staring out the window so.
Head in hands and eyes – gone from here.
Where are you, Dear?
Come back to the classroom, my pretty brown girl
I fear you’re halfway around the world.
Where is that mind of yours now?
Outside the winter stabs through the air
sneaks past the classroom windowpane and there
beneath a truck
a frozen bird being sniffed by a stray cat,
I don’t yet know the word ‘disdain’
But in this moment, the world feels far away
I dream of stepping out into it one day to rest my feet
in unfamiliar sand, to touch the hand of a boy or girl
on the other side – where it’s nighttime now, or summer there.
And maybe return to this place, a different girl with
just a trace of who I used to be echoing somewhere nearby
to me and as the teacher goes on and on her words are suddenly
becoming a poem that I may sing on an orange afternoon
inside a room where people will know my name.
This is an excerpt from the paperback edition of Brown Girl Dreaming, out tomorrow.
Jacqueline Woodson is the 2014 National Book Award Winner for her New York Times bestselling memoir Brown Girl Dreaming, which was also a recipient of the Coretta Scott King Award. Her latest novel Another Brooklyn is a finalist for the 2016 National Book Award for fiction.
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17 Borderline Ridiculous Things Most Latinas Could Live Without
No, we don’t all want to call you “papi.”
Being described as a food dish or rare animal.
Having unnecessarily earlier curfews than brothers or primos.
Hearing opinions that are basically insults.
FOX / Via big.assets.huffingtonpost.com
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A Clown With A Chainsaw Terrorised A London University
The university are working with the police to catch the person.
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Alicia Keys Gave Donald Trump The Middle Finger In The Middle Of Her Times Square Performance
“Middle fingers up, put them hands high.”
By now, we all know about the video the Washington Post released of Donald Trump engaging in some “locker room” banter about grabbing women “by the pussy."
In case you didn't already know, a hot mic recorded the presidential candidate saying, "You know I’m automatically attracted to beautiful, I just start kissing them. It’s like a magnet. Just kiss. I don’t even wait. And when you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything. Grab them by the pussy. You can do anything."
Robyn Beck / AFP / Getty Images
Trump's comments angered a lot of people, celebrities included.
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I'm Sorry Picky Eaters But You Have To Choose
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Mentally Ill Man Who Fatally Stabbed Academic Handed Indefinite Hospital Order
Dr Jeroen Ensink, a senior lecturer at the London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine, was stabbed to death last year.
Met Police
A man who fatally stabbed a top academic who had recently become a new father has been handed an indefinite hospital order.
Femi Tinchang Nandap, 23, from southeast London, attacked Dr Jeroen Ensink, a senior lecturer at the London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine, on 29 December 2015 as he made his way to post cards to loved ones to let them know about the birth of his daughter.
Nandap, who came to the UK to study African studies and economic development, pleaded guilty to manslaughter on the grounds of diminished responsibility at the Old Bailey on Thursday 8 September. He was suffering from paranoid schizophrenia at the time.
The court also heard Nandap had been charged with possession of a 30-inch knife and assault of a police officer who was trying to arrest him in May 2015. Just days before he attacked Ensink, those charges were dropped.
Femi Tinchang Nandap, 23, was suffering from paranoid schizophrenia when he stabbed Dr Jeroen Ensink to death.
Met Police
Ensink’s widow, Nadja, said she had no words to describe the pain she's going through. "Jeroen was everyone's friend, but he was my soulmate," she said.
"Our daughter was born on 18 December and it was everything Jeroen ever wanted. He was the proudest man ever, but he only got to share her life for 11 days. These were the happiest days of his and my life.”
She has also called for an inquiry into "mental health homicides" that "keep happening again and again", the BBC reported.
"If such tragedies keep occurring, why has there not been concerted action to address this?” she said.
"If a person with a history of mental health problems is found wandering about with a knife, and attacks a police officer, then that person must be referred to a secure unit for proper assessment and treatment and not given bail so easily."
Ensink, 41, whose work helped people in deprived countries, was pronounced dead at the scene in Hilldrop Crescent, north London.
After a short chase by Met police officers, Nandap was arrested and taken to Islington police station, before being charged with murder.
Judge Nicholas Hilliard QC, sentencing, described the unprovoked attack as being of "extreme ferocity", adding there was no way Ensink would have survived it.
Nadja Ensink (centre) speaks alongside her mother (right) outside the Old Bailey in London.
Stefan Rousseau / PA Wire/Press Association Images
Hilliard went on to describe Ensink as a truly remarkable and inspirational man, and told the court that no sentence can begin to reflect the enormity of the family's loss.
"It's rightly been said that his death is a loss to a large proportion of the world's poor," he said. "It's a dreadful irony that a man who devoted his life to those he would never know or meet, was himself killed by a stranger."
Detective Chief Inspector Jamie Piscopo, of the Met's Homicide and Major Crime Command, said: "What should have been the happiest time of Jeroen's life was ended on 29 December 2015 by the violent and unprovoked actions of Nandap.
“Jeroen did not stand a chance during the attack, and now, sadly, his daughter will grow up without her father in her life," he added.
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Can You Guess Which Classic Books These Opening Lines Are From?
First things first!
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Rihanna Low-Key Dragged Chris Brown On Instagram With A Low-Quality Meme
End those exes, RiRi.
Even though the last fuck Rihanna gave is older than you, RiRi gave a semi-fuck on Instagram over the weekend to throw some subtle shade toward all of her exes (*cough* Chris Brown *cough*) with the help of a low-quality meme:
She got you there, Breezy!
(And Leonardo DiCaprio but like, whatever, he has an Oscar.)
It wouldn't be a good Monday without some Rihanna shade to get you motivated for the week! #🏆
MTV
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I Watched The Debate While Monitoring My Vital Signs And Holy Crap It Was Stressful
Talk about fight or flight.
This election season has been stressful.
Every day (every moment?) there's reason anew to be anxious about November 8, which is why the simple act of watching a debate can be...tense.
In fact, I actually skipped watching Trump and Clinton in the first debate, because I just didn't have the emotional bandwidth to bear witness that day.
Sally Tamarkin / BuzzFeed News
So, I watched the debate wearing a Fitbit Charge HR and a Withings blood pressure monitor.
Because I'm a fitness editor and this sounded like a normal thing to do.
I took my heart rate and blood pressure throughout the debate to see how my body responded to every stressful moment, from discussion of Hot Mic-ageddon to mentions of Deplorablesgate. (Gadget rental company Lumoid lent us the wearables for this experiment.)
Sally Tamarkin / BuzzFeed News
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24 Insanely Clever Ideas For Halloween Pumpkins
Yer a pumpkin, Harry.
Charlotte Gomez / BuzzFeed
Jack Skellington Pumpkin
Heisenberg Pumpkin
— sierrak4
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Are You More Ken Bone Or Karl Becker?
Either way, you’re pure af.
Yesterday America suffered through the second presidential debate, and everyone agreed that two heroes emerged from the wreckage.
Scott Olson / Getty Images
The first was Ken Bone, a man with a name almost as cool as his sweater:
NBC
And the second was Karl Becker, who restored our faith in humanity and town hall-style debates:
NBC
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17 Grindr Stories You'll Have To Read Between Your Fingers
Accidentally sleeping with the person your mother lost her virginity to is… wow.
"I got a message from this guy asking if he could pick my nose for $20. I blocked him after he said he would give me $300 for a toenail."
– wyattb408078059
"So I saw this extremely hot guy that was in my area. He said he worked out and was a model for a men’s clothing company. The 'clothing company' he worked for ended up being Trojan condoms."
– amandatotaldiva
"I met up with a random Grindr guy at his house. He had dolls in glass cases all over the house, including his bedroom. After leading me to the bedroom, he spent 30 minutes making a playlist for us to have sex to… The music was the best part of the sex. I ejaculated to 'MMMBop' by Hansen."
– kevindallash
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Pro Athletes Are Calling Out Trump For His So-Called "Locker Room Talk"
“The attempt to normalize it as any type of ‘talk’ is wrong. I refuse to let my son think that this is ‘just how men speak.’”
At Sunday's debate, Donald Trump repeatedly sought to make amends for his vulgar comments about sexual assault by describing them as "locker room talk."
"This was locker room talk," he said of a 2005 video showing him boasting about grabbing women "by the pussy" without their permission and trying to sleep with a married woman. "I'm not proud of it. I apologize to my family. I apologize to the American people."
Paul J. Richards / AFP / Getty Images
"Certainly I'm not proud of it, but this is locker room talk," he said.
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21 Times Tumblr Perfectly Summed Up Your Parents
parents: YOUR ROOM IS SUCH A MESS me: this is my design
When you wait for food.
hysterifun / Via best-text-posts.com
When they don't want you to be cool.
jacksmannequin / Via jacksmannequin.tumblr.com
When you get found out.
slydigged / Via slydigged.tumblr.com
When they're really predictable.
count-sudoku / Via count-sudoku.tumblr.com
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Literally Just 13 Photos Of Usain Bolt Holding Really Tiny Things
To make your day a little brighter.
Macey J. Foronda / BuzzFeed
Macey J. Foronda / BuzzFeed
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How Basic Are Your Stationery Opinions?
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What Fantasy Movie Should Every Geek Watch Before They Die?
You can say Harry Potter, it’s fine.
Fantasy is by far the best movie genre, and if you disagree, you are mistaken.
The Jim Henson Company
It's a great form of escapism, and the term "fantasy" encapsulates so much.
Warner Bros.
There are romantic fantasy movies, like Stardust...
Paramount
...comedic fantasy movies, like The Princess Bride...
Act 111 Communications
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This Patronus Quiz Will Actually Consider The Animal You Like Most
After all, you should kinda get to choose, shouldn’t you?
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The Head Of Marvel TV Is Still Defending A White Iron Fist
“The importance of Danny as an outsider is something that is a theme,” Jeph Loeb told BuzzFeed. “I think once they see it, they’ll understand.”
There has been a lot of controversy around the fact that Marvel hired a white man (Game Of Thrones actor Finn Jones) to play Danny Rand in their upcoming Netflix series, Iron Fist.
Craig Barritt / Getty Images
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