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This Is The Weird Stuff People Search For On Google

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” How do I google something?” — A real thing people google on Google.

Australian-based search agency Search Factory used Google's Keyword Planner Tool to gather stats on the weird shit people search for, and the results are...interesting. This is why you need to clear your browser history before you die.

"How to hide a dead body" - 1K avg. monthly searches
"How to get away with murder" - 1.9K avg. monthly searches
"Cat dating" - 110 avg. monthly searches
"How to make my cat love me" - 390 avg. monthly searches
"Lady Gaga naked" - 135K avg. monthly searches
"Is Lady Gaga a man" - 18.1K avg. monthly searches
"How to ask a guy out" - 14.8K avg. monthly searches
"How to mend a broken heart" - 9.9K avg. monthly searches
"How to have an affair" - 5.4K avg. monthly searches
"Why did I get married" - 40.5K avg. monthly searches
"I hate my job" - 22K avg. monthly searches
"How to win the lottery" - 40.5K avg. monthly searches
"How do I use Google" - 1K avg. monthly searches
"How do I Google something" - 4.4K avg. monthly searches
"Is Santa real" - 60.5K avg. monthly searches
"Why do men have nipples" - 18K avg. monthly searches

H/T Fast Company


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27 Things To Remember From The "24" Series Finale

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After going off the grid for four years, Jack is back. But before he returns, let’s look back on where we last left Mr. Bauer.

Remember Meredith Reed (Jennifer Westfeldt)? She's the journalist who tries to expose that the assassination of Omar Hassan (Anil Kapoor), the president of the Islamic Republic of Kamistan (IRK), was ordered by the Russian government.

Remember Meredith Reed (Jennifer Westfeldt)? She's the journalist who tries to expose that the assassination of Omar Hassan (Anil Kapoor), the president of the Islamic Republic of Kamistan (IRK), was ordered by the Russian government.

But President Allison Taylor (Cherry Jones) has her arrested to prevent the press from printing the truth. And that starts a string of events in which Jack Bauer (Kiefer Sutherland) tries to publicize the huge cover-up.

Fox

Then, Charles Logan (Gregory Itzin) and President Taylor have a phone conversation about the assassination and how Jack believes the orders to have President Hassan killed came from Mikhail Novakovich (Graham McTavish).

Then, Charles Logan (Gregory Itzin) and President Taylor have a phone conversation about the assassination and how Jack believes the orders to have President Hassan killed came from Mikhail Novakovich (Graham McTavish).

And that despite Charles' attempts to keep her in the dark, President Taylor needs to know that Russian President Yuri Suvarov (Nick Jameson) actually gave the orders. But Charles doesn't realize that Jack is listening to the call and recording him.

Fox

Jack takes Charles' right-hand man, Jason Pillar (Reed Diamond), hostage in order to gain entry into the United Nations perimeter.

Jack takes Charles' right-hand man, Jason Pillar (Reed Diamond), hostage in order to gain entry into the United Nations perimeter.

Jack needs to get in undetected in order to set up his sniper rifle to kill President Suvarov as retribution for his crimes.

Fox

Jack also has Jason stitch up his open wound.

Jack also has Jason stitch up his open wound.

BECAUSE NOTHING CAN KILL BAUER! Not even running around (literally) while he bleeds from the abdomen.

Fox


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Meet The Guy Who Just Went A Year Without Showering (And Isn't Stopping)

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Rob Greenfield made friends, found romance, and had the adventure of a lifetime, all without a single shower.

Brent Martin / Via robgreenfield.tv

Greenfield set a few rules for himself on his ride, meant to promote sustainability and eco-friendly living: He could only harvest water from natural sources like rivers and rain, or from wasted sources like leaky faucets. He also had to keep track of exactly how much he used, hoping to show just how little he needed to get by.

Over his 100-day bike trip, Greenfield was able to use less than two gallons of water a day, or eight Nalgene bottles.

Brent Martin / Via robgreenfield.tv


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The 23 Most Disrespectful Things That Have Ever Happened

Johnny Weir's Hat Just Won The Kentucky Derby

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It wasn’t even a close race.

In the days leading up to the Kentucky Derby, Johnny Weir and Tara Lipinski warmed up in their best equestrian attire.

Then Derby day arrived, and Johnny showed up with this glorious, gleaming creation atop his head:

It featured a leaping, photo-finish stallion...


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30 Perfect Tattoos For Word Nerds

PayPal Fires Executive Who Went On Twitter Tirade Against Coworkers

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“Rakesh Agrawal is no longer with the company,” PayPal said in a tweet on Saturday. “Treat everyone with respect. No excuses. PayPal has zero tolerance.”


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Why Would A Gay Teenager Commit Hate Crimes Against Herself?

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Illustration by Lily Padula for BuzzFeed

Mrs. K can't remember what it was specifically that made her suspicious. Maybe how the eggs were splattered on the Jeep, or maybe her daughter's disposition. "I was starting to think, There's something wrong here," she says once she finally allows me to turn on a tape recorder. She doesn't want me to do this story and two nights ago tried to talk her daughter out of cooperating. Her daughter is a teacher now, and the reality is that having all this, all the hateful words — the fabricated ones and the real ones that followed — dredged back up could harm them both. I assure her I won't be using either of their names.

It's been 15 years, probably, since I've seen Mrs. K, and she looks the same, but slimmer. Her hair is still long and golden. We sit in her living room, almost knee to knee. A vase of fresh-cut daffodils stands on the coffee table. If I'm going to tear open these old wounds, she wants me to at least have the right information, so an hour into my visit, she stands up, walks to a cabinet behind me, and takes out two white binders. Inside these are just about every email she ever sent to the school and the police and others; a calendar she'd made documenting every act of vandalism, death threat, and venomous anti-gay slur; newspaper clippings; the fliers. And then the court petition, probation documents. She insists she hasn't opened the binders since she made them. "I have every piece of correspondence from my divorce," she explains. "I have my tax records for the last 10 years. This is how I roll."

Soon after the Jeep was egged, she did confront her daughter — we can call her Mary — at the Cheesecake Factory, but was convinced to back off. Those were hard years. She'd gone back to work and separated from her husband as her older daughter had gone off to college back East. There were tuition bills, bitter fights, a restraining order, an ever-waning trickle of alimony. She was working six days a week at some points. She remembers one night even taking work she had to do out to the car, watching the house through the night, trying to catch whoever was attacking Mary. And Mary, who'd always been independent, was drifting from her. "I had absolutely no control over her whatsoever," she says.

"I remember the people that were sympathetic — like this note," she says, holding up a greeting card from PTA representatives, still in its envelope, opening it with care. "'Dear Tam Student and Family, we're writing to offer friendship, support,'" her voice breaks, "'and solidarity with your family during this tremendously difficult time.' I'm telling you this meant so much to me. They'll never know." She shakes her head and wipes tears from her cheeks.

"So many people had expressed sympathy and now those same people were angry, too, that she had fooled them and did I know. I got that question a lot: Did I know?" Though they'd already planned to move out of Mill Valley before the truth came out, the timing was certainly serendipitous. "I literally could not go to the grocery store," she says.

She tells me emphatically about how Mary met all the conditions of her probation, how she immediately enrolled in community college, and from there, state school; from there, her teaching program. How good her grades were. Their relationship has healed.

"I do think she feels she needs to be an upstanding citizen now, that she needs to be the person that she was always capable of being. She is going to be that role model, that mentor, that leader of young people who are struggling, because she's been there."

Illustration by Lily Padula for BuzzFeed

Tamalpais High School is over 100 years old, which is really old for California. Its white stucco buildings are arranged on a steep green hill, and a clock tower stands at its center, fringed by sycamores, overlooking the intersection of Miller Avenue and Camino Alto in Mill Valley. It serves about 1,100 students from the southernmost chunk of Marin County, which borders San Francisco via the Golden Gate Bridge. The county and Mill Valley specifically are white and affluent and very liberal: Its median home price is more than $1 million and fewer than 1 in 8 are registered Republicans. Its redwood-shaded canyons are home to many helicopter parents and Priuses and some celebrities — film producers, actors, rockers of ‘60s and ‘70s repute. The weather is almost without exception pleasant. Days often begin shrouded in fog, but by midday it usually burns off, revealing the mountain, for which the school is named, rising 2,500 feet above, green skirts laid out around it. Locals mostly call the mountain, and the school, Tam.

It was characteristically pleasant the Monday morning of Nov. 1, 2004, when Vice Principal Candace Curtis was alerted on her walkie-talkie that she needed to go down to Ruby Scott Gym, to the girls' locker room. Curtis, a petite woman with a mess of brown hair, had been working in the schools for over two decades, first as a teacher, and for the last dozen or so as an administrator. In the cement-floored, low-lit locker room, a custodian pointed out what he'd found. It had been done with a ballpoint pen, evidently. The three letters were blocky and strange but what they said was clear: "FAG."

Ms. Curtis determined that the locker belonged to Mary, who was a senior and active on several sports teams. Ms. Curtis didn't know whether she was in fact a lesbian, though, like many, wouldn't have been surprised if she were. She was heavyset. Her light brown hair was buzzed into a crew cut and she dressed in more masculine clothes — collared shirts, plain T-shirts, baggy jeans. When Ms. Curtis called Mary to the office and explained what had happened, her reaction was hard to parse, but she accepted an offer to go home early. She asked only that Ms. Curtis not tell her mother why. The locker was repainted.

A few days later, her mother did find out, and that Sunday wrote Ms. Curtis a pointed email. Her daughter, she explained, had been under a lot of stress as of late, so much so that just two weeks before she'd asked the school counselor for a psychiatrist referral. She could not believe that Ms. Curtis wouldn't have alerted her of this obviously troubling incident. Ms. Curtis hardly had time to reply before the second graffiti was discovered, on Monday. This time it was on the door of the girl's white Jeep. Again those same odd, blocky letters, only larger: "DIE FAGGOT."

A week later, on Nov. 14, a note was found on her windshield, one that'd been typed up large enough to fill the piece of paper. "YOU CAN RUN BUT YOU CAN'T HIDE," it read, "WE KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE. WHEN WE'RE DONE WITH YOU YOU WILL BURN IN HELL." The next day, the gym locker again, "RUN FAG RUN," as well as urine. This, Curtis and others presumed, was probably the work of a man, and yet how did a man not only go into the girls' locker room without being noticed, she wondered, but know which was the correct locker? The administration, her counselors, and now the police, asked Mary again and again who might be behind these attacks, whether she could recall anyone bullying or stalking her. She said she had no idea. She said she couldn't recall being victimized on account of her sexuality before.

Soon Mary confided in her small group of friends about what was happening. They were horrified. One of her best friends, Nina Hirten, recalls: "I identify as bisexual and I know plenty of other kids when I was there identified themselves as not straight. Maybe it's going to be me [next]. Who's going to write on my car?" But then it became clear whomever it was was targeting Mary: "That's fucking lame," Hirten recalls thinking. "In some ways she's an easy target because she's obvious and outspoken and well-known and makes herself known."

Rumors spread. Nobody official gave a name, but nobody needed to. We heard a girl, a senior, an athlete, was the victim of anti-gay attacks, and we guessed rightly who was meant. Mary and I had been friends in middle school, but by senior year, we had grown apart. I wouldn't have felt comfortable approaching her and saying I was sorry about what was happening. This is partly because I had no real confirmation she was the victim, but also because whatever was happening to her was embarrassing and strange. Years later, I wondered if this was cowardly.

On Nov. 19, a note was found under her doormat at home: "THEY MAKE IT HARDER BUT NOT IMPOSSIBLE AND WE ONLY FIGHT HARDER THIS IS YOUR LAST WARNING WE'RE AROUND EVERY CORNER AND IT'S TIME." Two days later, in the evening, Mary went out to her car. She noticed an egg had been smashed on the back of it, and saw another on the ground nearby. It was then, she'd later tell authorities, that a third struck her in the temple. She looked up, she told them, shocked, confused, and heard laughing and unintelligible yelling. When sheriffs arrived on scene, emotions were running high. They had to separate Mary and her mother so they could calm them down and get statements. When they investigated the scene, authorities also discovered "FAGMOBILE" scrawled in dirt on the car.

"She never saw who it was," Mill Valley Police Department Captain Jim Wickham told the Marin Independent Journal that week in the first news story about the incidents. "It may be students; that's one thing we're looking at." Multiple former classmates who are gay but weren't yet out now cite the incident with the eggs as one that scared them the most — the idea that she'd been followed home.

In late November, they found "FAG CLASS" on the doors of one of her classrooms. In early December, it was "DIE FAG" spray-painted red in two-and-a-half-foot-tall letters in the school's central Keyser Hall, a location that investigators noted the victim had to pass to get to her first class. "DIE FAGGOT" was found scrawled on the girl's bathroom door. "FAG CLASS" on another classroom. Around this time the sheriff and police department devoted further resources to the investigation; the FBI was contacted. Still, as the IJ reported, "No suspects have been identified."

"The mother was calling me constantly," Ms. Curtis says. "'How are you keeping my daughter safe?'" She didn't have a good answer. No matter what she did, she would get another call early in the morning across the walkie-talkie, a custodian saying she better get down and take a look at something. "My stomach would just get in knots. I was on edge every day for all those months, never knowing when something else was going to happen."

When she'd worked at another high school in the county a few years prior, Curtis remembered the IJ "blasting" the school because of some what she terms "racial incidences" that had occurred. On an impulse, with no permission, and certainly no budget, she and her secretary designed and ordered a big banner and had it hung from the clock tower. "I had no idea when I got it how expensive it was going to be," she says now, chuckling. It read: "AccepTance, compAssion, eMpathy."

Curtis made a point of attending the Gay–Straight Alliance meetings, which were now occurring weekly; Mary was co-president. A letter was sent to the students and their families by Principal Chris Holleran, detailing the crimes and their efforts to curtail them, including the "establishment of a $1,000 reward for information, support services for the targeted student, and promotion of our anonymous tip line." Fliers littered campus. "Got information?" they asked, adding, "It's your community." Another of the victim's friends began a campaign passing out rainbow ribbons.

Finally, one night, police seemed to catch a lead: They caught three students on campus dressed in camouflage. This included the 18-year-old Perry twins, who were somewhat infamous around campus and town, always, it seemed, protesting their innocence to a hall monitor or jumping off something tall. Police drew firearms and got them on the ground. Their 17-year-old companion was released, but the Perrys were photographed and fingerprinted and charged with trespassing while detectives tried to get them to confess to the crimes. But they insisted they'd been trying to solve the crimes: "We were trying to figure out who was doing this," Clayton Andrew Perry explains now. "I have family members that are gay." (They were maybe also interested in the cash.)

"We're good people, right, but we just had this stereotypical kind of outlook on us," he says, adding that he and his brother are both paramedics. He spent two days in county lockup, the only time in jail he says he's ever done.

A candlelight vigil was held in the front of the school in mid-December, where 250 attended; even the TV news was there. Guest speakers included two representatives of a local LGBT organization called Spectrum and a woman from the office of the local San Francisco state Sen. Carole Migden, herself openly lesbian. The winter sun descended early and candles flickered. The event ended with a junior on a guitar leading the crowd in a tearful rendition of "Let It Be."

"That place was packed. Absolutely packed," Candace Curtis recalls.

Jeff Vendsel / Marin Independent Journal


Who Should You Party With At The White House Correspondents Dinner?

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It’s White House Correspondents Dinner weekend and all the A-listers from Hollywood and Washington are ready to party. Who are you going to hang with?

9 Videos You Can't Miss This Week

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Featuring one college graduate’s very unfortunate attempt at a backflip, a hamster eating the world’s tiniest burrito, and an absolutely terrifying landslide in Baltimore.

Emma Stone Takes On Jimmy Fallon In Epic Lip Sync Battle

Emma Stone Takes On Jimmy Fallon In Epic Lip Sync Battle

Who wins when Jimmy Fallon and Emma Stone compete to see who can put on the best show? We all do, because this is so much fun it's ridiculous. (7:26)

youtube.com / Via buzzfeed.com

Seal Gets Belly Rub From A Diver

Seal Gets Belly Rub From A Diver

Scuba diver Jason Neilus captured this footage while diving in the U.K.'s Farne Islands. This has to be one of the cutest uses of a GoPro yet. (1:22)

youtube.com / Via buzzfeed.com


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Myths About Sex Debunked

"The Other Woman,""Walk Of Shame," And The Fake Feminist Comedy

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Two new movies show just how much Hollywood struggles to figure out what to do with funny women.

The Other Woman

Barry Wetcher/Twentieth Century Fox

When Paul Feig and Kristen Wiig's terrific Bridesmaids became a box office hit in 2011 — and it was a monster-sized one, the highest grossing female comedy of all time — basic Hollywood practice should have dictated that in the next year or two, we'd see a slew of clones attempting to capitalize on the same magic. But those raunchy chick-centric movies never materialized. Feig followed up his success by directing the similarly raucous buddy cop film The Heat with Sandra Bullock and Melissa McCarthy in 2013, and in between, there were the milder, musicals Joyful Noise and Pitch Perfect. Still, pickings remain slim.

Maybe the problem is that the industry tends to think that a movie can't just be about women — it has to be about girl power, projecting a canned message of empowerment even if it leaves its characters dangling in the wind or humiliates them for laughs. That's definitely the case for Walk of Shame, which hit theaters this weekend, and The Other Woman, which opened last week. These are comedies that trumpet being yourself and female bonding, while spending most of their actual runtime having their heroines called whores or only ever talking about men. One of the things that made Bridesmaids work so well is that its characters had personalities, histories, hopes, and insecurities. Walk of Shame and The Other Woman have types — good girl and bad girl, dumb and sexy, or successful and controlling.

Walk of Shame

Jaimie Trueblood/Focus World

The Other Woman made nearly $25 million in its first weekend, besting Captain America: The Winter Soldier for the top spot at the box office — great if unnecessary proof that there's an underserved audience eager to watch comedies about women like this. But it's a clumsily made, weirdly paced, brainless revenge film that squanders its awesomely game-leading actresses. High-powered lawyer Carly (Cameron Diaz) discovers her new dream guy Mark King (played by Jaime Lannister himself, Nikolaj Coster-Waldau) is actually married to ditzy housewife Kate (Leslie Mann), and eventually, they find out he also has another mistress, Amber (Kate Upton). But rather than fight with each other, they bond to inflict summer camp-worthy pranks (including putting laxatives in his drink) on Mark before upping the stakes to financial ruin.

Among the The Other Woman's offenses are that its bits of physical comedy are allowed to drag on until everything funny about them has been drained away, that the actual revenge process doesn't even get going until the final third of the film, that it has a joke about how icky transwomen are, and that it contains Nicki Minaj's acting debut but confines her to a few thankless scenes of being a sounding board for her boss, Carly.

But what's really maddening about The Other Woman is that it's a film about female friendship that, as NPR's Linda Holmes astutely pointed out, fails to pass the Bechdel test. All scenes in which Carly, Kate, and, eventually, Amber might be talking about something other than Mark are consigned to one of the many wordless montages. It's as if the film, which was written by Melissa Stack and directed by Nick Cassavetes (The Notebook), either doesn't care or just has no idea what the characters would otherwise say to one another, substituting instead shots of laughing set to songs like "Girls Just Want To Have Fun." (Seriously.)


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33 Movie Titles That Perfectly Describe Your Sex Life

Is Chivalry Dead?

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“Chivalry is dead, but we’re letting women think it’s not.”

31 Ways To Seriously Deep Clean Your Home

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Your home isn’t truly clean until all the unexpected places are spotless and sanitized.

1. Get stains out of your microfiber couch with rubbing alcohol.

1. Get stains out of your microfiber couch with rubbing alcohol.

551 East uses isopropyl alcohol, a white sponge, some elbow grease, and a white bristle brush to make her couch look like new. Just make sure, like she says, to get white tools so that the color dyes don't transfer to your fabric.

2. Steam clean mystery stains out of your carpets using an iron.

2. Steam clean mystery stains out of your carpets using an iron.

You don't need to rent a giant hulking carpet cleaner, unless you plan on doing the entire house. You just need your iron, according to Homemaker Chic.


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Your Summer Plans: Expectation Vs. Reality

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With finals behind you, it’s time to get serious about Summer 2014.

Expectation: You rent a cute place for the summer with your best pals.

Expectation: You rent a cute place for the summer with your best pals.

Of course three unemployed undergrads can afford an amazing aparment!

NBC / Via law-mom.tumblr.com

Reality: You move back in with your parents.

Reality: You move back in with your parents.

Hi mom....

Paramount Pictures / Via theechoboomer.com

Expectation: You land an awesome PAID internship at a cool company.

Expectation: You land an awesome PAID internship at a cool company.

Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer / Via moratoriumchronicles.com

Reality: You end up working for less than minimum wage at the mall.

Reality: You end up working for less than minimum wage at the mall.

NBC / Via pishelle.buzznet.com


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25 Incredible Views Above The Clouds From Around The World

This Mom Booty-Bumping Her Kid In The Face Is The Best Thing You'll See Today

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A mother’s twerk is never done.

While Summer Knowlden was practicing for an online dance-off competition for moms, her inquisitive daughter got more booty than she bargained for.

youtube.com

She's off to a good start...

She's off to a good start...

youtube.com

And Summer's really starting to get into it, when...

And Summer's really starting to get into it, when...

youtube.com

BOOM — she booty-bumps her daughter in the face. Whoops!

BOOM — she booty-bumps her daughter in the face. Whoops!

Don't worry, the kiddo was A-OK: "Our daughter didn't even cry; she just laid on the ground a little surprised," Summer wrote.

youtube.com


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The Toronto Symphony Orchestra Made A Mashup Of Drake's "All Me" And "Trophies" And It's Awesome

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Came up, that’s all me, stay true, that’s all me.

The Toronto Symphony Orchestra plays Drake like you've never heard it, and it's so good.

Represent, T-Town.

Represent, T-Town.

Via drakesgifs.tumblr.com

26 Real Places That Look Like They've Been Taken Out Of Fairy Tales

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