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The 20 Stages Of Babysitting Your Friend's Evil Spawn

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I’m. never. having. kids. EVER.

You walk in and they're all cute and smiley, and you sigh with relief. "Kids are people too," you think to yourself.

You walk in and they're all cute and smiley, and you sigh with relief. "Kids are people too," you think to yourself.

Comedy Central / Via giphy.com

The parents leave, and for the first 20 minutes, things are going so well that you think you're dreaming.

The parents leave, and for the first 20 minutes, things are going so well that you think you're dreaming.

I don't know why parents are complaining all of the time...this having a kid thing is a piece of cake.

REACH to EARN / Via lyraparish.com

But then, they give you the look and you know to be very afraid.

But then, they give you the look and you know to be very afraid.

MGM Television / Via knowyourmeme.com

And then all hell breaks loose.

And then all hell breaks loose.

ADAM GET DOWN FROM THE GODDAMN ROOF YOU ANIMAL

20th Century Fox / Via giphy.com


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Songwriters Are Losing $2.3 Billion A Year Due To Outdated Government Regulations

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The National Music Publishers’ Association, the lobbying group for songwriters, said the lost revenue is based on what it believes its constituents could collect if government regulations were lifted. The claim is the latest salvo in a heated debate between the music industry and satellite, streaming, and other new music distribution services over royalty rates.

Lucas Jackson / Reuters

Outdated copyright law and onerous government regulations are costing songwriters roughly $2.3 billion a year in lost revenue in the U.S., according to the National Music Publishers' Association. That's $100 million more in lost revenue than the $2.2 billion in revenue the music publishing industry collected in the U.S. last year, according to the NMPA, the trade organization charged with representing the interests of songwriters.

But there's a caveat: The lost revenue calculations are based on what the NMPA assumes the industry could collect in the absence of government regulation. To be sure, government copyright regulations have been the focus of intense debate over the last few years as the NMPA has battled with satellite, streaming, and other new music distribution services over royalty rates for its songwriters' work.

The NMPA's report, in fact, follows by a day a hearing before a House Judiciary subcommittee to review copyright law as it pertains to the licensing of music. Yesterday's hearing, and another scheduled for June 25, are aimed at deciding what changes are needed to laws governing how music rights are paid for and how to implement them.

"The new digital marketplace is changing how songwriters and their music publishing partners can thrive. As the marketplace evolves, it is essential our industry no longer be hamstrung by outdated laws and government regulation," said David Israelite, NMPA President and CEO, in a statement.

Right now a byzantine system is in place that not only dates back more than 70 years but also differs depending on the distribution platform. Traditional radio stations, for instance, pay royalties to the composer of a song, but not to the artist or band performing it — known in industry parlance as a performance right — if they are different. Sirius XM only pays royalties for songs released after 1972. Pandora does pay government-mandated royalties to songwriters but has been aggressively lobbying regulators to lower the rate in recent years. Use of music in both professional and user-based content on YouTube and other websites and in TV shows or commercials is yet another category of music licensing, with the difference being that it is free-market-based and not subject to government oversight.

While music publishing lacks the glamor and sex appeal of recorded music, in recent years it has taken on greater importance for labels and artists as an income source as CD and download sales have waned. Separate compensation systems are in place for the composing of a song's music and lyrics and its recording since in many cases the person or persons writing or producing a song is different from the singer or band performing it.

A wave of consolidation has swept through the industry as major record labels have sought to build up their publishing catalogs — EMI's music-publishing division, for instance, was sold for $2.2 billion to a group headed by Sony/ATV Music Publishing, Sony Corp.'s joint venture with the estate of Michael Jackson — and private equity-backed firms have sprouted up to roll up their own stable of artist catalogs.

For its part, the music industry's goal is to move to an entirely free market system where individual publishers can negotiate licensing deals with companies directly. It already does this with specific companies such as Apple for iTunes Radio, but the industry ideal would be to move to this model for all licensing deals. According to the NMPA, annual revenue for music publishers would increase to $4.52 billion in the U.S. in a free market system.

The fear, however, is that such a move wouldn't create a fair market at all but a wholly unfair one tilted in favor of the three major music publishing companies, which also happen to be the three major record labels: Universal Music, Sony Music, and Warner Music.

37 Reasons Britannia (Still) Rules The Waves

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T̶h̶e̶ ̶s̶u̶n̶ ̶n̶e̶v̶e̶r̶ ̶s̶e̶t̶s̶ ̶o̶n̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶B̶r̶i̶t̶i̶s̶h̶ ̶E̶m̶p̶i̶r̶e̶.

America's best pick-up line.

America's best pick-up line.

Via reddit.com

Earth's most sensual sight.

Earth's most sensual sight.

Via reddit.com

The chap who invented this thing.

The chap who invented this thing.

BBC

The World's Best Police.

The World's Best Police.

Via imgur.com


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Uganda's Foreign Minister Sails Through UN Election Despite Concerns Over LGBT Law

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Sam Kutesa has been unanimously elected president of the UN General Assembly.

Ugandan Foreign Minister Sam Kutesa with Russian Foreign Minister Sergei Lavrov

AP Photo/Frank Franklin II

Despite allegations of corruption and a spotty record on human rights, Ugandan Foreign Minister Sam Kutesa was elected president of the United Nations General Assembly on Wednesday without a single vote cast against him.

While there were some scattered calls for Kutesa's nomination to be opposed — including a Change.org petition that had more than 13,000 signatures by Wednesday afternoon — heavyweights in the world of human rights and UN advocacy never made serious calls for member states to vote against him. The election rules made it all but certain that he would take office, and the rotating presidency is a ceremonial post with very little power to affect the areas of policy where Kutesa's record might cause the most concern.

Of top concern to human rights advocates in the west is the fact that Kutesa was an outspoken supporter of the law criminalizing homosexuality and LGBT rights advocacy enacted in February. But the International Gay and Lesbian Human Rights Commission, for example, did not formally oppose his nomination.

"We're engaging in this within the confines of what's politically possible at the United Nations," said the group's program director, Marianne Møllman. So instead of pouring energy into a battle that was all but hopeless, Møllman said, IGLHRC "will contact the president of the [General Assembly] as soon as he's sworn in and say, 'you know that you're there to uphold the principles of the United Nations, including nondiscrimination."

Fighting his nomination seemed pointless, said a U.S. diplomat speaking on background to discuss UN politics, because "the only way that somebody like that could not get the job is for another African candidate to run against them." It's an African's turn to hold the rotating presidency, and the African nations had agreed to back Kutesa well before the formal vote on Wednesday.

Another African country could put up another nominee — and there have been contested elections in the past — but Uganda would be a powerful enemy for any nation that wanted to run its own candidate. And there is no African country eager to make an issue over Uganda's LGBT rights record. Even the government of South Africa, which has been a leader in advancing LGBT rights at the UN in the past, has shrunk from publicly condemning the new law.

Instead, Uganda's critics are hoping his election can present an opportunity to highlight the ways the country has fallen short of international norms.

"The UN Charter places respect for human rights and dignity at its core, and it is the job of the General Assembly — and its President — to uphold these principles," the US ambassador to the UN, Samantha Power, said in a statement following the election. "At a time when girls are attacked by radical extremists for asserting their right to an education; representatives of civil society are harassed and even imprisoned for their work; and lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender people are endangered for who they are, including by discriminatory laws, the work of the United Nations to advance equality, justice, and dignity for all could not be more urgent. In the face of these challenges, all of us working in and at the United Nations should recommit to vigorously defending these core principles."

And in practice, the presidency is a largely symbolic post. The U.S. diplomat said Uganda could now organize plenary events on special topics, but the president tends "to put forward very bland, innocuous things that have the support of the Assembly — feel-good kind of topics."

Kutesa included some potentially divisive priorities in his acceptance speech, including reaching an accord on climate change. But the only human rights issue he identified as a priority was "advancing gender equality," which may be surprising given the Ugandan government's recent passage of an Anti-Pornography Law that women's activists have decried as the "miniskirt law" that has led to attacks on women wearing clothing deemed to be salacious.

While "concerned that the new president of the UN general assembly has been defending a deeply discriminatory Anti-Homosexuality Law," said Human Rights Watch's United Nations Director Philippe Bolopion, "we hope he won't be in a position to promote ideas or values that are intrinsically discriminatory and contrary to the values of the UN Declaration of Human Rights."

Kutesa isn't the first UN General Assembly president with a troubling human rights record. The last African to hold the post, Ali Abdussalam Treki, had been a longtime member of the regime of Libyan dictator Muammar al-Qaddafi before he was elected to the post in 2009.

13 Crazy-Awesome Popcorn Recipes For Netflix Marathons

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These impressive recipes would make Olivia Pope proud. Start chomping while re-watching Season 3. Or OITNB . Or anything.

Peanut Butter Cashew Popcorn

Peanut Butter Cashew Popcorn

Peanut butter goes with everything. I mean EVERYTHING.

julieseatsandtreats.com / Via julieseatsandtreats.com

Cookies & Cream Popcorn

Cookies & Cream Popcorn

Yes, want, yes.

Via chef-in-training.com

Spicy Caramel Bacon Popcorn

Spicy Caramel Bacon Popcorn

I hear bacon tastes good.

acozykitchen.com / Via acozykitchen.com

Peanut Butter Cup Popcorn

Peanut Butter Cup Popcorn

One has to understand. Peanut butter is not the same as peanut butter cup. Two different but both glorious foods.

Via jaseyscrazydaisy.com


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Would You Pass School English Now?

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These are multiple choice, however, instead of the essays. Questions inspired by GCSE English and the SATs.

19 Signs That BuzzFeed's All-Cats Newsletter Is For You

Hershey Sues Colorado Company Over Marijuana Candy Knockoffs

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Colorado-based makers of edible pot treats have been sued for names that mimic Hershey’s candies like “Ganja Joy” and “Hasheath.”

Hershey has filed a lawsuit against a Colorado company for creating marijuana-infused edibles, which feature names and packaging that mimic Hershey's signature candy bars.

Hershey has filed a lawsuit against a Colorado company for creating marijuana-infused edibles, which feature names and packaging that mimic Hershey's signature candy bars.

Via Hershey Chocolate & Confectionery Corporation et al v. Tincturebelle, Llc et al

Hershey says the famous Reese's, Almond Joy, Heath, and York candies have all been used to sell pot-laced edibles by TinctureBelle. Hershey's accuses the edible company of trademark infringement, trademark dilution, false designation of origin, unfair competition, and passing off.

The lawsuit includes these side-by-side comparisons to illustrate how the cannabis candies attempt to copy Hershey's branding.

The lawsuit includes these side-by-side comparisons to illustrate how the cannabis candies attempt to copy Hershey's branding.

Via Hershey Chocolate & Confectionery Corporation et al v. Tincturebelle, Llc et al


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27 Intensely Embarrassing Sex Stories That Will Make You Feel Better About Your Own Sex Life

In Case You'd Forgotten: Nicole Kidman's Naturally Curly Hair Was SO RAD

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Re-trend request: She’s a glam lady of the silver screen now, but Nicole Kidman’s hair used to have such whimsy and fly-by-the-seat-of-her-pants attitude .

Oh, GIRL. You're young and carefree, and your hair is as wild as your yet-to-be-written future could be. It's the '80s, and your hair is so THEN, and so YOU.

Oh, GIRL. You're young and carefree, and your hair is as wild as your yet-to-be-written future could be. It's the '80s, and your hair is so THEN, and so YOU.

Bring back the magic, if only every once in a while!

Patrick Riviere, Hulton Archive / Getty Images

So natural. So height-of-the-Springsteen-era.

So natural. So height-of-the-Springsteen-era.

Nilsen Premiere/ BMX Bandits

It's clear what those eyes are saying: "My hair entrances you, and there's nothing you can do to stop it."

It's clear what those eyes are saying: "My hair entrances you, and there's nothing you can do to stop it."

Newspix / Getty Images

It's 1990, and the stylists have gotten their mitts on your mane.

It's 1990, and the stylists have gotten their mitts on your mane.

Terry O'Neill / Getty Images


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16 Dogs That Out-Kanye'd Kanye West

What Does Your Nail Polish Color Say About You?

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Are you racy in red? Or mellow in maroon?

8 Celebrity #TBT Photos You May Have Missed This Week

These Baby Red Pandas Are Here To Cheer You Up

30 Things That Will Make You Want To Party Like It's 1999


Attack Of The Frankenbots: Meet My Bizarre Twitter Impersonators

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An investigation into a new, poetically odd kind of Twitter spam.

FrankRamspott/FrankRamspott

He noticed that number of accounts had copied, verbatim, a tweet I'd sent a few days earlier, which had included the Twitter handle of said colleague. The accounts all used my Twitter handle (@hreins), but with one letter added to the end — @hreinsx, @hreinsn, @hreinsr, and so on. But the accounts did not use my photo, name, or bio. Instead, most of them were styled with the bio, photo, and name of those awful parody accounts from the movie Ted. (see here if you're fortunate enough to be unfamiliar). A little piece of different people — all brought alive for an unknown spamming purpose! Call them the Frankenbots.

Because they were only mimicking my tweets, and not following me or mentioning me in them, I didn't learn of their existence until the bots copied a tweet that included my coworker's Twitter handle. But once I did, I had to investigate.

Most were the aforementioned and unfortunate Ted accounts. But some took on the physical identity of "Mark Hillary." They did the same thing — tweeted my tweets, but with the picture and bio of a writer in Brazil.

Not every account tweeted every tweet. Different ones seemed to delve further back, choosing different days or weeks from my Twitter timeline and replicating those tweets.

It was strange, and confusing, but also mostly hilarious and almost artistically bizarre.

"There's an odd poetry to seeing your disembodied tweets," gchatted a coworker when some of the bots copied a tweet from a few days prior that had mentioned her.


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20 Reasons PDA Is The Worst Thing To Ever Happen To Humanity

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GET A ROOM.

PDA, or public displays of affection, are all the rage for couples who like to parade their sickening affection for one another for the world to see.

PDA, or public displays of affection, are all the rage for couples who like to parade their sickening affection for one another for the world to see.

MTV / Via giphy.com

Getting your mack on is normally AWESOME, but doing it in public is just disgusting and shameless and this madness needs to stop now.

Getting your mack on is normally AWESOME, but doing it in public is just disgusting and shameless and this madness needs to stop now.

MTV / Via giphy.com

Couples think they look romantic, and perhaps even a little sexy when they PDA. BUT THAT IS FALSE.

Couples think they look romantic, and perhaps even a little sexy when they PDA. BUT THAT IS FALSE.

imgur.com


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This Is Why Americans Hate Soccer, Summed Up In One GIF

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He got rewarded for THAT?? Brazil wins the World Cup opener 3-1.

This flop from Brazilian striker Fred was rewarded with a penalty kick — that Brazil then scored to give them their first lead in a 3-1 win over Croatia.

This flop from Brazilian striker Fred was rewarded with a penalty kick — that Brazil then scored to give them their first lead in a 3-1 win over Croatia.

Japanese referee Yuichi Nishimura also gave Croatian defender Dejan Lovren a yellow card on the play.

ESPN

You got lucky, Brazil.

You got lucky, Brazil.

ESPN

LINK: This Is What It Looks Like When Brazil Scores A World Cup Goal

LINK: The World Cup Got Off To A Super Sad Start For Brazil


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19 Reasons Young Marlon Brando Will Ruin You For The Rest Of The Day

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#ThrowbackThursday, Brando-smoulder style.

That stare.

That stare.

Hulton Archive / Getty Images

Those dimples.

Those dimples.

Ed Clark / Time & Life Pictures

That lean.

That lean.

Photo via John Kobal Foundation / Getty Images

Those arms.

Those arms.

Hulton Archive / Getty Images


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Croatia's Coach Looks Suspiciously Like Joseph Gordon-Levitt

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Hmmmm.

This is Niko Kovač, the Croatian national football team's manager.

This is Niko Kovač, the Croatian national football team's manager.

Warren Little / Getty Images

Here he is looking a little less terrifying.

Here he is looking a little less terrifying.

Nice profile, bro.

Warren Little / Getty Images


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