You tried.
When substitutions must be made:
When you exercise portion control:
imgur.com / Via Twitter: @sassytbh
When it's the thought that counts:
When you're a responsible consumer:
23 Pictures That Perfectly Sum Up Attempting To Be Healthy
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Matthew Perry And Thomas Lennon Find Out How Well They Really Know Each Other
Jon Premosch / Mollie Schafer-Schweig for BuzzFeed
Matthew Perry and Thomas Lennon are no strangers to each other: They've starred alongside each other for years — remember the instant classic 17 Again? — and can currently be found spending hours together on set filming their hit CBS show The Odd Couple. Upon playing our BFF game we discovered that they are, in fact, a kind of "odd couple" and they actually know each other really well. Watch the video below, then read on to see how they fared!
What is Tom most likely to be found doing between takes on set?
BuzzFeed
Matthew Perry: I've got mine.
Thomas Lennon: My answer is "Stretching out like Richard Simmons." Wow, look at that. We got it. No matter how much money we make on winning this [game], he has more.
What is Matthew most likely to be found doing between takes on set?
BuzzFeed
MP: I misspelled something.
TL: Lying on a couch!
MP: You got me. OK, we do know each other!
TL: We actually know each other really, really well.
What is Tom's favorite curse word?
BuzzFeed
MP: My favorite swearword is different.
Jon Premosch / BuzzFeed
Perfect. In that case, what is Matthew's favorite curse word?
BuzzFeed
TL: I think it's something fun, you've got that Canadian flair...is it "clusterfuck"? Like, "This has turned into a real clusterfuck, eh?"
MP: No, that's not a swear word.
TL: Oh. What’ve you got?
MP: Fuckface.
TL: Oh, fuckface! I was close!
MP: I just put the word fuckface in my play.
TL: Did you? Did people like it?
MP: Yeah. Laughed a lot.
TL: They love it.
MP: "Clusterfuck" you thought was my favorite word?
TL: No, I was trying to think of a word. I don't hear you swear very much.
MP: I swear a lot.
TL: Really?
MP: Yeah.
TL: Not at me.
MP: No, internally. You should hear what I'm saying right now.
TL: You can listen if you get really close. [leans in] Oh yeah. That's pretty dark.
What is Tom's secret talent?
BuzzFeed
MP: Yeah, very different. We failed that round.
TL: If you think I'm good at yoga, you should see me juggle.
MP: I can juggle, too.
TL: Yeah, I know! We should juggle on the show together.
What is Matthew's secret talent?
BuzzFeed
MP: Ooh. I don't know what my secret talent is.
TL: Look how quickly I started writing.
MP: I don't know what my secret talent is!
TL: Want me to tell you? What'd you write? Complaining? Or tennis! So if you need someone after the weekend who's gonna complain about the staff —
MP: — but that's not a secret talent, everybody knows I play tennis!
TL: Everybody?
MP: [To BuzzFeed] Don't you guys know that I play tennis?
BF: I kinda knew.
MP: But you don't know that I complain all the time!
What was Tom's high school yearbook superlative?
BuzzFeed
TL: The real one? I really was one. And it's pretty lame! It's not Most Likely to Have Jazz Hands. [To Matthew] What'd you put?
MP: Most Talkative.
TL: No! I was voted Most Likely to Succeed!
MP: Oh, you were!
TL: I was voted Most Talkative.
MP: I could see that!
What would you say the biggest perk of being Matthew's friend is?
BuzzFeed
TL: This is just one. [To Matthew] What'd you put? "Getting to hang out at [your] house." The house is amazing. I actually put something similar: "Riding around in his cool cars."
MP: There you go!
TL: Also, it's a lot of fun! It's like I'm Robin. I'm your Robin a lot of the times.
MP: Yeah, you are.
TL: We should get a little sidecar.
MP: Yeah, we should.
TL: Yeah, you know?
MP: That sounds like a joke, but I think you're serious.
TL: I'm pretty serious. I'll do a sketch later of the little sidecar. I want to ride around in it!
What would Tom say is the funniest thing that's happened while you were filming?
BuzzFeed
TL: I put the time we almost had to kiss. That was pretty weird, remember?
MP: I put any time we argue.
TL: Oh, there you go!
MP: Well, that's the funnest part. The funniest thing is when we argue.
What type of food does Matthew hate the most?
BuzzFeed
TL: I wrote "green things"!
MP: I wrote "fish."
TL: Oh. I forgot you hate fish.
MP: I hate fish.
TL: I know that for a while I was buying you a green juice every day. Then one day you said, "Don't ever ever do that again."
MP: I thought I was being real nice and you were like, "Just don't. Just stop."
TL: I like those wellness shots, though!
MP: Those, I know! Those are good.
What type of food does Tom hate the most?
TL: I honestly can't think of anything.
MP: That's what I said!
TL: I know. I'm just a positive person.
Jon Premosch / BuzzFeed
What is Tom's favorite role of Matthew's?
BuzzFeed
TL: I don't know his name, so I'm going with what I refer to him as. [Looks at Matthew's answer.] Ah! Studio 60 guy apparently has a name.
MP: We got that right?
TL: Of course!
MP: All right!
TL: You know I loved you as Studio 60 guy! Always walking around fast.
What is Matthew's favorite role of Tom's?
BuzzFeed
TL: I put "Cop in shorts."
MP: Same thing!
TL: Oh, there we go! We did it.
Last question: Without looking at each other...what color are each other's eyes?
BuzzFeed
TL: Hazel. You were very close.
MP: I'm close. And you're right.
TL: Yeah, ice blue.
Jon Premosch / BuzzFeed
The Odd Couple airs Thursdays at 8:30 p.m. ET/7:30 PT on CBS.
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Can You Guess The Disney Channel Show Based On A Single Screenshot?
It’s really isn’t as easy as it seems.
Disney Channel / Michelle Rennex / BuzzFeed
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17 Tumblr Posts That Perfectly Capture A Bad Day
*Internal screaming.*
When you're having trouble with that pokerface.
When you're lying awake thinking about your every mistake.
And when you try your best to put the drama behind you.
When every small little thing keeps going wrong.
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Exactly How Many Fucks Do You Give?
Do you give a few fucks? Like, three fucks? Or no fucks at all?
Buena Vista Pictures / Via imgur.com
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Can You Name These Early '00s Wrestlers?
Do try this at home.
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KFC Had To Delete This Tweet That Implied Their Chicken Was A Dude’s Dick
Finger lickin’ good?
Earlier today, KFC Australia tweeted out the following weird as hell tweet:
It was up for a good two hours before someone probably saw it and thought, “is that guy’s dick burning from fucking the KFC?" and the tweet was deleted.
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17 Celebrity Stories That Had People Talking In 2006
Paris, Lindsay, Britney, and Nicole ruled the headlines.
Nicole Richie was arrested after driving under the influence of drugs:
Richie was arrested for driving under the influence after two 911 callers saw her driving on the wrong side of the highway. Richie admitted to taking Vicodin and smoking pot.
Handout / Getty Images
Paris Hilton got arrested for a DUI:
Hilton was arrested for driving under the influence, with a blood alcohol reading of .08. Hilton blamed the reading on not eating all day, and drinking one margarita - she was allegedly on her way to In-N-Out when she got pulled over.
AP
Lance Bass came out to People magazine:
Lance Bass came out to People magazine in 2006 but later said he felt forced by Perez Hilton and other bloggers.
People
Angelina Jolie confirmed she was pregnant with Brad Pitt's child:
Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt confirmed the impending arrival of their first biological child in 2006 and the world collectively lost their shit.
Fabrice Coffrini / AFP / Getty Images
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An 18-Year-Old Faces Decades In Prison For Live-Streaming Her Friend's Rape
The girl, 17, was allegedly assaulted by a 29-year-old man while Marina Lonina broadcasted it online.
Franklin County Sheriff's Office
Franklin County Sheriff's Office
Lonina and Gates were indicted by a grand jury on Wednesday.
The trio was drinking together and the girl's ability to "to resist or consent was substantially impaired," O'Brien told the Columbus Dispatch.
At some point during the night, Gates allegedly forced himself onto the girl and began to rape her, the statement said.
Lonina then whipped out her phone and began to live-stream the attack, authorities said.
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Can You Guess The Film Based On A Screenshot Of Steve Buscemi?
He’s got Steve Buscemi eyes.
Frederick M. Brown / Getty Images
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What Percentage Emo Were You?
Back in the day were you obsessed with “I’m Not Okay”?
Scott Gries / Getty Images / BuzzFeed
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15 Britney Spears Faces All Unemployed College Graduates Will Recognize
“How come you don’t have a job?” - Satan
When someone says that they know of a position you can apply for.
Wait, so you're saying there's actually an opening I haven't heard of? That's pretty much impossible.
Fox / Via ak-hdl.buzzfed.com
When you can sense someone's about to ask you if you found a job.
Please don't ask me that. I'm trying, OK? Let me live.
Fox / Via media2.popsugar-assets.com
And when you decide to lie because that animal shelter you volunteered at one time back in high school kinda counts as a job.
I mean, I haven't showed up there in, like, five years, but I think they still know my name so it's not really a lie.
Fox / Via tumblr.com
When someone in college says they'll find a job right after they graduate.
Good luck with that.
Via img.buzzfeed.com
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32 Whimsical Hair Accessories You Can Actually Pull Off
Add a little ~pizzazz~ to your hairdo.
Jenny Chang/BuzzFeed
We hope you love the products we recommend! Just so you know, BuzzFeed may collect a small share of sales from the links on this page.
These rainbow pom-poms waiting to be flaunted around in the sun.
Sun's out, poms out.
Get them from Asos for $13.55.
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Ted Cruz Says He Won't Ban Dildos If He Becomes President
“What people do in their own private time with themselves is their own business and it’s none of government’s business.”
Carlo Allegri / Reuters
Ted Cruz says he will not ban dildos and other sexual toys if he becomes president.
In a Mother Jones story earlier this week, it was revealed that Cruz defended a state ban on the sale of dildos as Texas's solicitor general.
"There is no substantive-due-process right to stimulate one's genitals for non-medical purposes unrelated to procreation or outside of an interpersonal relationship," a brief co-authored by Cruz read.
Cruz, asked by WABC radio host Curtis Sliwa if he would ban "the sale of sexual toys, dildos, or anything that sexually stimulates you," answered that he would not.
"Look, of course not, it's a ridiculous question, and of course not," Cruz told Sliwa on Friday. "What people do in their own private time with themselves is their own business and it's none of government's business."
Full interview:
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Are You Better At Spelling Than Everyone Else?
We are going with STANDARD AMERICAN ENGLISH for this quiz. American. Not British.
Hittoon / Getty Images
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Which Of These Things Is Not Like The Others?
Which one of these things just doesn’t belong?
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Queen Of Coachella Vanessa Hudgens Got A $190 Manicure For The Festival
She totally nailed it.
It's a commonly known fact that Vanessa Hudgens is no mere mortal burdened with an average life on this celestial plane — she is, in fact, THE QUEEN OF COACHELLA.
Christopher Polk / Getty Images
Like, NO one does Coachella like V-Hudge. It's just a fact. Deal with it.
Michael Buckner / Getty Images
After years of attending, Vanessa decided to step up her already otherworldly Coachella game and sprung for THIS manicure, worth an astounding $190:
— Swarovski crystal clusters worth $15
— Hand-painted rose gold leaf pot leaves
— It'll last two weeks
— Oh, and the procedure takes nearly THREE HOURS to complete
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Norman Reedus And Diane Kruger Interviewed Each Other And Shit Got Real
The stars of Sky talk first kisses, tabloids, and the meanest actor they’ve ever worked with.
Jon Premosch / Chris Ritter / BuzzFeed
You're likely already obsessed with The Walking Dead fan-favorite Norman Reedus, and the equally talented Diane Kruger, so putting the two of them together onscreen seems like an automatic hell yes. Now starring in the new drama Sky, the duo stopped by BuzzFeed New York to sit down in an intimate one-on-one interview with each other — discussing everything from Norman's eye makeup to the meanest actor Diane has worked with — and let's just say, things got very real. Here's what went down.
Diane Kruger: What attracted you to the script of Sky, to want to do it?
Norman Reedus: Wow, I mean, I said yes before I read the script, to be honest.
DK: Great! [laughs]
NR: Yeah, it was Fabienne on the Skype call, and I just kind of fell in love with her, and she was like, would you do it? And I'm like, yeah, I'll do it. And I knew who was involved [you], so I said yes before I even read it.
BuzzFeed
Norman Reedus: Tell me, what song did you have your first kiss to?
DK: I hate you so much.
NR: I know you do.
DK: Um, my first kiss, was [to] Don Johnson.
NR: God. What's the song? Can you hum it?
DK: It was called "Tell It Like It Is" and it's uh…
NR: How's it go?
DK: I can't, I can't sing it to you right now. I cannot believe you're putting me on the spot like that, you are such a dick!
BuzzFeed
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41 Of The Most Suspenseful Books You'll Ever Read
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Sanders Lawyers Do Not Like These "Bernie Is My Comrade" T-Shirts One Bit
The Bernie Sanders campaign has asked a company to stop selling merchandise with the tagline “Bernie is my comrade.”
Justin Sullivan / Getty Images
An online merchant has accused the Bernie Sanders campaign of "trademark bullying" after a Bernie 2016, Inc. attorney sent him a cease and desist letter regarding T-shirts, mugs, and sweatshirts depicting the candidate with historic communist leaders.
Claire Hawkins, a lawyer with Garvey, Schubert, Barer — which said it is "the official organization" of the campaign — sent the letter to Daniel McCall, demanding his company, Liberty Maniacs, stop selling the items.
The products show Sanders next Karl Marx, Joseph Stalin, and others with the tagline, "Bernie is my comrade."
"I was surprised Bernie's campaign would have done that," McCall, who designed the image, told BuzzFeed News. "He didn't seem to be the type of candidate, the type of guy, who would do something like this."
"I'm waiting to see what happens, but I would think Bernie, or one of his staff members will step in and put an end to it. It appears to be pretty silly."
McCall called Liberty Maniacs "a portfolio of my jokes."
"As an intellectual property owner, our client is obligated to take steps to protect its trademark and copyright rights and to protect the good will built up in its name and brand," Hawkins wrote.
Hawkins also demanded the company "destroy and/or take offline" any existing products that use the image.
Paul Levy, McCall's lawyer, responded to Hawkins, accusing the Sanders campaign of "trademark bullying."
In his letter, Levy wrote to Hawkins: "It is your contention, apparently, that an ordinary and reasonably prudent consumer would tend to be confused about whether it is the Sanders campaign that is promoting Sanders' candidacy by associated him with the 19th Century theoreticians of the communist movement as well as with three ruthless Communist Party dictators."
Levy called the contention "absurd," adding that the Sanders campaign "cannot use trademark theories to silence members of the American public who disagree with your client's views and oppose his candidacy."
Levy wrote about the letters in a blog post for Public Citizen, an advocacy group founded by Ralph Nader. He wrote in the blog that that lead counsel for the Sanders campaign told him that Garvey, Schubert, Barer sent the demand letter without any consultation with the Sanders campaign.
Hawkins and a spokesperson for the Sanders campaign did not immediately respond to requests for comment.
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